Tonight, I cried....
We got ready, loaded up in the truck..
drove 45
mins to look at a huge Christmas lights display..
A whole caravan of
our family..
Cousins and aunts and uncles and grandparents
and even
great grandparents!
Isaiah did not get uncomfortable
even once..
Left
there and headed into the next town
for coffee and Panera..
He laughed
and played and was totally content with my daughter in the dark of the
backseat with us..
My husband and I sipped coffee and my daughter
giggled and told me how beautiful I sounded as I sang
along with Norah
Jones all the way home..
Huge for our family..
Huge....
This December has
been a such a turning
point in so many ways..
Isaiah had an itch and ooze free
birthday..
Itch and ooze free Christmas..
Out and about with no wet wash
cloths and extra balm..
Got home late and didn't even give Isaiah a
bath
until after midnight..
He rode his new trike next to my daughter's
scooter all day long..
Amazing..
I found myself tonight rocking him to sleep..
Holding his soft little hand up against my face,
thanking God
for his smooth, scab free little fingers..
It hit me so hard and the
tears began to flow..
I was back in our chair, that old worn out
recliner,
in the dim light from the kitchen and my mind
went back to
those months before..
The months we were bound to that chair..
Living
day and night as I held his oozy
wet bloody fingers.. Those nights
where
I prayed and begged for a miracle..
When I cried for the torment to
end.. I sighed because
there were no words that I even knew to speak..
I
wished for change.. My heart was heavier than
my mind thought I could
even bear back then,
only a few short months ago..
I hoped for life to
come to our son and our home again..
I wanted a 'normal' day and night..
I wanted Isaiah to enjoy life and be pain free..
Just to rest on a
light pillow, not a bed of suffering..
I counted the minutes that felt
like they would never end..
The months that seemed to stand still
as life was moving and continuing around us..
Seemed to be leaving us behind..
...
My mind went back to that place, and I
fully realized we have overcome that hell..
We have survived..
Our son
is alive and thriving..
We have made a full year with
NO hospital stays
with Isaiah ..
NO doctor visits! We have now had almost
a full month
with no gauze..
Huge....
I wanted to say to you that are in those dark nights of TSW
that seem to never end, hang on!!
Dawn does come! Life comes
back!
Hope will fill your hearts again and the tears
that fall will not
be full of pain,
but of thankfulness and joy..
Don't ever give up!
Ever!!
Even when you think you can't make it another moment..
Push
through!! You are stronger than you know
and more capable than you even
realize..
You are brave and courageous and you will win this fight!
You
are an overcomer!!
My love is so deep for you all
and Isaiah and I could
have never made it to this
place without you..
We are here for you!
And
will help carry you with our love and prayers..
Keep moving forward..
Next blog post - click here: MY TWO YEAR TSW UPDATE!!
